You said that you believe Dylan didn’t look at Eric after he had shot himself but a post you linked to says that from the crime scene photos “If you were to push Dylan from behind back to Eric’s knee, he would end up in an almost-kneeling position” – looking at the photo again and imagining this, does that not put Dylan in a position where he was facing Eric as he knelt?

Per the crime scene photo, Eric’s lower body was sprawled out after he’d blew off his head with the shotgun. The kick from the shotgun likely pushed him back forcefully so he was laying flat and his upper torso off to the side. Dylan was in a kneeling position facing the direction of the library windows and directly below him on the floor was Eric’s legs, and farther back from his line of vision, was Eric’s torso and bloody pulp of a head.  When Dylan shot himself, he fell forward landing face forward on the knee region of Eric’s pants.  Dylan and Eric were both facing the windows when they shot themselves and were not facing one another.

I know you’ve already answered how Dylan *felt* when Eric shot himself but do you think- after seeing Eric’s head completely explode (not in a big major way but he did fuck up his face) do you think Dylan was like “ew” or something lol

You’re right, I already answered this one.  😉  My feeling is that Dylan knew what Eric had done without having to even risk looking back at him. He experienced Eric’s death with his other senses besides full-on visuals. That way he could stay focused on executing his own death. He was now all alone, gun in hand, with his figurative back up against the wall.  It was now or never.  See here.

Wow, have you seen Devons recent post talking about Dylan? It’s so sad.

I have, yes. 😕 Devon is such an eloquent writer and always has such a beautiful way with words. I figured I would share her public message here with all of you…💖

Hey #walkupnotout

As a survivor, I live every day with thinking what I could have done differently. Having been friends with a murderer, how did I fail? How did my actions or inactions lead to the murder of my friends? Could I have told Dylan I loved him and would that have stopped him? What if I had spent more time with him? What if I had swallowed my fear and dislike of Eric?

What if what if what if? My rational brain says that it’s highly unlikely that I would have had any effect on what happened. But I still march. And I still speak out. And I spend every April 20th practising and advocating for kindness. I can’t live in regret, I can only use my experience to press forward.

Stop victim blaming. And stop discouraging social discourse – especially about difficult subjects like the senseless murder of children. Protest, activism, and awareness are not mutually exclusive to kindness and compassion.Walk out.

Walk up. I walk with each of you.  
March 14, 2018

I’m having trouble understanding how Dylan was so cruel during the shooting; I was reading Lance Kirkland’s account & it’s chilling how heartless Dylan was. Granted, to carry out a mass shooting in the first place is disturbing but Dylan apparently took sadistic glee in the murders. I would imagine witnessing a human dying&in pain would naturally induce some mercy yet instead it was met with mockery. Can you help explain his psychology here? Especially since Dylan was generally a caring person .

People that decide to murder people generally hang the caring hat up at the door and leave it behind. Dylan is certainly no exception. You can’t walk on the school grounds full of an assortment of weapons, ammo and explosives and be that killer that kills his victims gently and with oodles of kindness and compassion. A murderer needs to be cold and disconnected from their own humanity and others in order to destroy others, to be merciless. I answered an ask which was similar to yours and explained the psychology behind it here and here.