Don’t you think that Dylan and Eric would have gone to hell when they died because the killed people?

The only hell that Dylan and Eric could have gone to is of their own making as their spirits left their bodies and the earth plane.  If they felt badly about themselves and what they’d done then they would only be preventing themselves from transitioning to the higher astral planes. They, and anyone that felt undeserving and unworthy of moving onward, could potentially be trapped in the lower astral planes of existence and in a realm of their own creation based on what they expected they deserved to find. It amounts to a ‘hell’ conceived of their own making. For example, some spirits that haven’t processed their death yet or are still tormented by things they’d said and done in their last incarnation may be, for an example, trapped in a black murky stasis where they feel as if they are wandering helplessly, lost and utterly alone.  But they are never truly alone, they just haven’t worked that out yet in limited awareness of their present situation. They haven’t removed their own blinders to become aware outside their self generated torment that there is always guidance if they let go and open themselves to it. The key about creating the reality you wish to find on the other side is essentially all about forgiveness. Forgiving oneself is the hardest lesson of all and that process can be in stages for some based on what they feel they do or do not deserve after their death. So, Dylan and Eric each died expecting what they would find or would not find on the other side.  They created and conceived their own reality based on their thoughts and what they were open to or expect and most importantly whether they felt they deserved the potential of transcending onward to the boundless experience in the higher spiritual realms.  

Yes, they did commit a horrible act of violence and killed people; they took the lives of other spirits.  But the judgment we pass here on the earth is not the same as it is over there.  In the spiritual realm, the human deemed ‘bad’ actions that they’d committed here on the earth plane becomes but one of many, many learning experiences our souls are capable of undergoing. It series of choices that we humans can make or choose not to. The spiritual incarnations of ‘Eric’ and ‘Dylan’ chose to undergo a difficult human experience before they were souls born here and as a result of living those lives, they ended up experiencing struggles and ultimately making choices that were fear-based rather than out of love and letting go. Their egos got stuck on the importance of taking revenge and having the last say with the school.  They clung to that anger and bitterness which originally stemmed out of a place of fear from being bullied. They chose fear, hate and destruction and got stuck on that rather than to just move on with their lives and choosing life after High School.  Once they died, their spirits would be processing and reflecting on those series of choices. Ultimately the entire spiritual universe is essentially about love and forgiveness. Dylan and Eric would progress and ascend to higher realms only as soon as they found it in themselves to finally release the past, to work with the lives of the soul’s they’d taken and most importantly, to learn to forgive themselves. Only then would they be able to progress into what you would probably call ‘heaven’ or the higher spiritual realms.  There is no permanency of perpetual ‘hell’ for those who die, only stages of spiritual progression and enlightenment. 

Dylan transitioned to the higher spirit realm more effortlessly because he had already envisioned transcending to the “Halcyon”. He created his reality with his thoughts over a period of time before 4/20. Dylan had expectations for his afterlife, of freedom, happiness, love and bliss. In addition to that, Dylan already had a sense, an awareness, of how the universe worked in the grand scheme of thing. He came to the conclusion that his existence as the human body and the entity of ‘Dylan Klebold’ was extremely hard to manage and he was finding himself unable to cope:  “Wierd life; Weird Time; Weird Existence”  So, he made the choice to opt out but also made a very destructive choice in addition to self destruction – the taking of many lives along with him. He was so checked out in a state of apathy, he really didn’t factor in what the act of murdering people would do for him in terms of processing those choices in the spiritual realm.  All he had was a head start in knowing that things would be less of a struggle on the other side than in the physical plane but again,  he also had to do a lot of work to progress and deal with a sense of regret and responsibility and his obligations for those choices made. He has had to do a lot of owning up and I do think he has mostly come to terms with his fair share.  
Eric’s transition would’ve been less easier because he had no clue what was in store for him on the other side. “I hope death is like a dream-like state”  He hoped. But it was just a big giant question mark to him really. When Eric killed himself abruptly and prefunctory, he was in an intense state of a lot of self hatred/loathing, pain and very tormented.  I’d say he took a lot of time in the lower realms stuck in a sense of anger, failure and self repudiation. Let’s just say it’s been a looonger process for him to integrate and evolve..  

Both transitioned in different manners but it’s all good and neutral because no matter what level they were/are at in the process, it is simply just a learning experience for their souls. There is not a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to be while in the midst of evolving; it’s all about learning from from your choices – either fear or loved based – and being open to forgiveness, love and enlightenment, especially within your own self.

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The Chemical Brothers – Block Rockin’ Beats – Live at Woodstock 1999  
In a nod to the original hippy Woodstock Festival of ‘69, this fest had a lot of topless chicks apparently..;) 

Block Rockin’ Beats was a favorite enough for Dyl  that he selected it for the music on the “Techno” section of his website design layout (too bad he wiped his computer, I wonder if he ever finished his website?).  Notice the strong funk beat and heavy percussion rhythm to it. Very Dyl. Not surprising that he took up the drums as a kid. Dude had innate rhythm always snapping his fingers when the mood struck him. 

Dylan wasn’t much into lyrics.  When it came to techno, says Devon, “LIke, the more bass he could get in that music, like subwoofers and stuff, the better.  He really liked that.  A lot of it is mostly instrumental, which he liked a lot.  He didn’t have to deal with all the lyrics and stuff.  He wanted to make up his own mind what the music was about.  He did not like to be told what to be feeling.  He was an individual.  He always strove to be an individual.  He didn’t always succeed.  You can just lose yourself in techno music.  I remember nights staying up with him and he just drifted off.  Music shuts down the outside world.”   

crimeandcolumbine:

NATHAN DYKEMAN Well, I’d called first just, you know—I was concerned, I was calling all my friends, trying to make sure that they got out and they were OK. And Dylan’s parents I called last, because I—I called them with the hope that he was there and be OK and everything, and it basically eased up to me telling them that I think that he was involved in it, and I think he could possibly be in the school.

CHARLES GIBSON You were talking to Mr. Klebold?

NATHAN DYKEMAN Yes, I was the one that broke the news to Mr. Klebold.

CHARLES GIBSON Who you know very well, having spent so much time at their house?

NATHAN DYKEMAN Yes, yes.

CHARLES GIBSON And what did he say when you said Dylan might be one of the shooters?

NATHAN DYKEMAN He was just in shock. He was speechless. And I also thought he was going to, like, drop the phone. He just could not believe that this could possibly be happening, and his son was involved in this. And he said just, “Please keep me informed on whatever you hear.” And he got off the phone with me to contact the authorities.

Interview Part 2

ask-rebandvodka:

Hello, this is the second part of the interview with a past pupil of Columbine as it was highly requested. 🙂

Q: 

did E&D sit alone together at lunch? Didn’t any girls want to date them? Does she ever see E&D’s family around town? What is the most misunderstood thing about Columbine in general? (Submitted by anonymous)

A: Sometimes when I went to the cafeteria, I would see Eric, in particular, on his own. Dylan usually would be wandering the school doing stuff or on the computers. Not to mention, Eric would probably go and find him ten minutes after being on his own.

Not many girls talked to them, Dylan tended to shy away from those kinds of situations and change topic. Eric on the other hand, I never really saw him with girls. But on the rare occasion when I did, he’d be really nice to them.

I don’t see any of their families as I moved out of Littleton. I did see the Klebold’s but that was before the massacre.

The most misunderstood thing about Columbine? Well, in my opinion, Eric and Dylan were teenagers like everyone else in the school. People forget that. They were picked on, and people look past it because once someone says “Oh yeah, these kids were bullied”, it’s as if they are blaming themselves for not stopping the bullying, yet they don’t want to blame themselves. They want to blame Eric and Dylan, which is only partially correct. They should be completely held accountable for what they did (I am, in no way, sticking up for their actions), but people who don’t understand that these two kids found it easier to shoot people to express their rage rather than opening up says a lot about the school system and how mental health is seen nowadays. I think that’s the most misunderstood thing.

Q: 

will you ask her if they ever mentioned their pets/animals? (Submitted by anonymous)

A: Eric mentioned animals so many times, I could probably write a book. He really loved animals, and this many seem strange, but I honestly only really remember him talking about animals to this day. 
Dylan didn’t really talk about his pets. But, you could tell some days before he left for school he probably picked up his cats and there would hairs all over his shirt.

Q: 

who she thought Dylan reminded her of? (Submitted by everlasting-contrast

A: Dylan didn’t remind me of anyone in particular but I sure felt he belonged to the 60′s era. He was that type of guy. Or maybe it was his sunglasses. 

Q: 

did she go to the smokers pit with him and chat?

(Submitted by everlasting-contrast​)

A: No, I don’t smoke so I basically avoided that area. I usually talked to him in the school or the parking lot. 

Q: 

Did he have any distinct habits and indiosyncrasies that she noticed about him?

Did he say certain phrases a lot, did he swear regularly in conversation?

(Submitted by everlasting-contrast​)

A: He always ran his fingers through his hair. It’s just something he’d always do when talking or when he got shy. He did it constantly. 
I remember when I first started talking to him, he swore and went all red, constant ‘sorry, I didn’t mean to swear’ in between sentences. But after a while, he didn’t care anymore. It was usually ‘fucking this, fucking that’ and so on.

Q: 

Does she have any particular interaction between her and him that stands out the most in her mind?

(Submitted by everlasting-contrast​)

A: An interaction that stands out the most is probably when Dylan was eating something, I have no idea what, and ketchup dripped all over his face. He cracked up and everyone didn’t find it as funny as him, but his laugh was contagious, so in no time, everyone was laughing with him.

Q: 

Did she genuinely like him and think him a nice guy or just kinda ‘meh, he’s ok.’

(Submitted by everlasting-contrast​)

A: I genuinely liked him and he was a nice guy. I could turn to him if I ever got stressed out or needed help. He was a great listener. 

Q: 

did Dylan bash jocks or complain about the school within ear shot of her?   Did she ever see him drinking?  Did she ever see him working sound in the theater?  Did she have one or a couple one-on-one conversation with him and if so, what about?  Where did they end up congregating and interacting most of the time – the commons?

(Submitted by everlasting-contrast​) 

A: Only once, if I can remember he bashed the jocks. He complained that they always thought they were superior to everyone else and he didn’t like that. He wanted everyone to be treated equally for a school to function properly.    

I never saw him drinking but I remember one morning he came to school and I could smell vodka off of him, he was slightly hungover. Even more clumsy than usual too.

I did go to the theater a couple of times (mainly when my period had ended or it was lunch). Dylan was always tangling wires together (also tripping on some too) and taking orders from others. 

I had a lot of one-on-one conversations with Dylan, I can’t remember all of them but they would be normally about his very intelligent views on society, unfairness of the world, love, young people, school system failure. Many, many things that he was so well educated on, but was frightening he knew so much when he was so young.

We mostly talked in the cafeteria. Or class when the teacher was late.

Thanks for asking/posting today. Made my Sunday evening. 🙂 Surprised only one other person asked questions beside myself – really? Highlights for me..

“..you could tell some days before he left for school he probably picked up his cats and there would hairs all over his shirt. lol

“Dylan didn’t remind me of anyone in particular but I sure felt he belonged to the 60′s era. He was that type of guy. Or maybe it was his sunglasses.” 😉

“Many, many things that he was so well educated on, but was frightening he knew so much when he was so young.”  
She can not recall any little bit on conversations regarding love, society and views on society?  Hmm.. Well, I know something would’ve stuck with me.

you think Dylan was a tits or ass guy?

Hmm, this a trick question.  I’d say both.. and why stop there?  Two choices are too limiting for Mr. Klebold who is the

Everything Frame of Mind’ kind of guy. The complete package both physically and personality-wise, her laugh, her smile, et al.-  are the multidimensional attracting components for him.

P.S. This question doesn’t even work for Eric because he was a Leg man. Tossing you a bonus fun fact here and ah, this is not even an Eric Harris blog. Geez, look at all the free time I’m giving the Reb here on Dyl’s blog….

Can you explain twist Dylan meant when he said he would want his ‘perfect girl’ To have an air of sadness about her? Like what did he mean by that? Thanks!

Love Letter:  “I hoped we could have been together…you seem a bit like me. Pensive, quiet, an observer, not wanting what is offered here (school, life, etc.) you almost seem lonely, like me.”

“…I will have a love, someone who is me in a way, someday..”

“I love her she loves me. I know she is tired of suffering as I am.”

“As my love will find me, she feels as I do right now, I can feel it, we will be inseperable.” 

He longed for a girl who was a reflection of himself, his own pain, suffering and struggle. For she would understand him as he did her.  Two incomplete halves that would become whole and complete in their uniting.

So was the girl he loved really Marla Foust?

We’ll never know for sure?  Marla  is certainly one of the top contenders mainly because she is someone that knew and hung out with him occasionally, and she also had the right number of letters to her name to fit Dylan’s Acrostic Poem.  But we need to keep in mind that dutch author,Tim Krabbé was speculating the letters and words Dylan might have used to fill in the blanks on his puzzle poem.

Maybe Marla 

do you have a picture of all the knifes from the day of the shooting

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These are the all the knives the boys carried with them on 4/20.

From left to right, we’ve got:

1. Eric’s liner-locking folder that looks like a Dragon Forge Cheetah.

2. Eric’s Gerber Mark 1 knock-off.

3. Eric’s Pakistani-manufactured Khyber Bowie.

4.Dylan’s  “Cobra” style knife with spiked knuckle-guard, similar to the one seen in the Sylvester Stallone movie. 

Eric wore his sheathed Khyber Bowie strapped to his right leg and Dylan wore his sheathed Cobra knuckle knife attached to his left hip. (don’t you love the opposing symmetry of that? Just another one with those Yin/Yang twosome.)

P.S. Dylan owned more than one knife but we’ve never seen those. He had enough of a collection that Byron commented on it. But ironically, Eric carried the most on the day.

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What’s the story with dylan and cats?

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Weeellll… Dyl was annoyed with the cat hairs sticking to his clothes. Yup. I’m guessing his two cats, Rock and Lucy, sometimes hung out in his bedroom and caused him a bit of grief with his ‘newly washed’ favorite black t-shirt.  I’m thinking he might’ve even had allergies too.  Can you imagine him with the pet hair lint roll trying to get the damn hairs off and cussing to the “controller of shit” for making his life infinitely more miserable.  Goddamn it! This is why I can’t have nice things!

Here’s a wee bit more on Dyl, his two kitties and his feline-like traits. 😉

Do you think Dylan genuinly enjoyed prom night?

I think he dreaded it at first and was looking forward to it being over. However, I think he found himself kind of pleasantly surprised in the midst of it all and by something he thought he would loathe so much. He was surrounded by some people he knew in the limo, some of which were part of the same gifted program in elementary school. They were all cutting loose and joking around. He was at ease enough with Robyn, enough to compliment how she looked and to hold hands with her as she initated that with him. The two clowned around over dinner pretending to light themselves on fire ( and what’s not to love here, hm?) Robyn and Devon managed to coax him out on the dance floor, and Devon got him to slooow dance with him to “Take My Breathe Away” – I mean, how is this miracle possible????!! Well, it apparently it was and so he must have felt o…k enough in himself to participate as much as he did – and part of that may have had to do with the fact that he was living this as if it was his ‘last party on the earth’. Celebration before death day countdown. He was going to do everything at that dance for the very first and very last time in his life, so why not? Just let go. Eric wasn’t there to set boundaries that he shouldn’t dance because ‘it’s ridiculous looking’. Dylan was with people that wanted to pull him in and get him to participate. That’s what he did to the best of his ability. 😊 Later, at After Prom, he got to rejoin up with Eric and his other dudes and they hit the gambling tables. I’m sure he was good at poker and figuring out all the right card deck moves and the right advantages to win. Guys eat that sort of stuff up, and he was no exception. Then Robyn took him home.. I love how Robyn drove him to and from prom – very cute that she was a bit ‘in charge’ that way because she claimed him to be the dude to go with her to prom. 😏 Yeah, I think he had a pretty good time, certainly better than he ever expected or hoped for.  Sue mentions that Dylan was actually effusive when he got home and confessed to her  “I had the best night of my life” according to her book “A Mother’s Reckoning”. I think that he meant that genuinely..that it was a pleasant surprise.

Doubts

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Brooks came home from school, and told his mom that a friend had tipped him off about a Web site Eric had created, in which in addition to hate language and angry threats such as “I am the law, if you don’t like it, you die. If I don’t like you or I don’t like what you want me to do, you die. God I can’t wait till I can kill you people”, he also threatened to kill Brooks. 

But Klebold cared enough about Brown to alert him to death threats on Harris’ Web site.  

It was Dylan, the loyal friend, who had tipped Brooks off about Eric’s Website. Dylan was afraid of Eric finding this out, so asked for Brooks to not tell anyone who had tipped him off.

“He was really looking out for me,” Brown said. “That’s the way he was. An extremely good kid.”

Although the Browns reported this to the police and they were aware of his Web site, no action was taken to look into it. No one, even Brooks, believed that Eric would follow through on his threats–they just thought he was blowing off steam. [Source and Source]  – 

May 2, 1999

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Doubts

A month after Columbine, Brooks reasoned that Dylan told him about Eric’s malicious website threats because he was looking out for him.  Two plus years later, he questions why Dylan would do such a thing: “maybe he thought it was funny” “maybe he was in on it with Eric”.  Years go by and Brooks complicates Dylan’s intent to do what he did, rationalizing it until he’s one big permanent ball of confusion. And yet, it seems pretty simple to me:  Brooks was Dylan’s friend from childhood but Eric was also Dylan’s present good friend. Dylan liked both and was obviously caught in a moral dilemma. He cared for the potential safety or lack thereof of his old friend yet was nervous to broach the subject with Eric and tell him to back off Brooks because in his defense of Brooks it would ruin his relationship with Eric. After Dylan lost Zack to Devon, he couldn’t stand to lose Eric as well over political shit about Brooks.  So, Dylan opted to take a risk, to secretly warn Brooks and tip him off about the website, purely out of respect for their history together.  He asked Brooks for his confidence and he pretty much solidly trusted that Brooks, his long-term friend, would not mention anything so he wouldn’t risk losing his friendship with Eric.  Dylan went behind Eric’s back to keep Brooks safe. There was no way to avoid that in trying to protect Brooks.  He knew Eric would never see it that way thus the subterfuge.  So, it seems crystal clear what Dylan’s intent truly was.  Brooks merely let the fact that Dylan made a terrible mistake in the last 49 minutes of his life color everything about his character long before he ever made that choice.  Long before Dylan was fully committed with NBK, he cared for all his friends and  never wanted to lose a single relationship with any of them. Dylan couldn’t stand the thought of abandonment, to either lose a friendship or by putting a friend’s life in jeopardy which in a sense, amounted to him abandoning them. He’d begun to worry when Eric, who had kept upping the ante with the Brooks website death threats, was going to finally simmer down and forget about it. It just kept getting worse, and eventually, Eric started broadcasting Brooks’ phone number up on the website. So, Dylan intervened and it was quite a risky thing to do for him but he was starting to get a bit worried. He knew the Brown family well from his childhood friendship with Brooks. He wasn’t super close with Brooks these days but they had a lot of good past times together; they were still friends, if a bit more distant. Dylan simply cared too much.  But, eventually it got to the point where he let go of the caring because the need to end the pain and leave the earth seemed to hold more sway.   If Dylan was the one that came across Brooks on the morning of 4/20, there is no question, imo, that he would’ve let him live.   Granted, it would have been a very awkward bumping in to one another but…it’s unquestionable that he would’ve spared Brooks’ life without need for considerations. The loyalty towards a friendship would’ve been clear even then on that terrible day when everyone was supposed to be fair game. Over the years, Brooks forgot this about Dylan and who he was in their personal friendship and doings together.

“He was really looking out for me. That’s the way he was. An extremely good kid.”

What Brooks said in May ‘99 about Dylan in the article above, is the uncomplicated truth which he’s chosen to forget and rationalize away. 
And Dylan was just that. End of story.  The act on that fateful day shouldn’t have negated any of the ‘good’ or ‘right choices’ that Dylan had made over the year/s before. A couple years after Columbine, Brooks begun to direly need for Dylan’s motivations to be questionable in that moment, shady even, because he simply could not manage to reconcile that Dylan was a good friend that made a decent choice in that moment as he’d done the majority of the times in his life beforehand – yet made one colossal destructive mistake in the end. And yet, the irony…that Dylan could’ve unwittingly stopped Columbine by making that right and good choice, by warning Brooks, but that was not to be in the Hand of Fate.